Stop Living in the Past

Posted on Posted in Dating & Marriage Motivation, Emotional Motivation, Entrepreneur Motivation

You are now a certain age. May be you feel your time is long gone; you feel old. May be you feel you are losing your youthfulness as days progress; life’s responsibilities have started to burden you with stress. May be you feel you are still way too young to know what you want out of life; right now you just want to explore and find yourself. Regardless, chances are there is some part of your past which runs your present and many times unknowingly affects how you visualize your future to be. It may be your health, relationships, finances, family values, or social life. But some part of you is always dwelt in past memories. Somewhere, somehow, this holds true for most of us. Isn’t that amazing!

It surprises me that we have patterns fromour past that affect what we believe will happen to us in our unseen futures. Somebody you gave your heart to cheated on you, for instance. You now live in this memory making it tough for yourself to trust someone yet again. Unconsciously you tend to link a new person in your life to those memories from the past questioning what if he/she cheats on you as well? You tried your hand at business and failed terribly. It took your self-confidence for a toss. You are now scared to pull up the courage to start again, and making it successful this time around. In other words, our fears from the past are those ghosts that keep us small. Hope, then, is stored only for those few moments of courage which we gather when we feel fully alive. Can we break our negative patterns, and rise to a state of permanent positive outlook towards the future?

I agree it’s not easy to break our past patterns. It’s absolutely not! But, let me tell you something very important to build a life of your dreams: It is necessary. Even those who have overcome this overwhelming modus operandi of living in past memories, I assure you, haven’t been able to do so easily. But, more significantly, they did it.

Now, being the curious head I am, all this raised few questions for me which bothered me for a while. Though some people have been able to overcome the challenge, why is that, in the first place, we spend so much time living in the past when we have a whole lot of present and future to take care of? Why is it difficult for us to move on? Why? It became a challenge whose solution I looked for everywhere- Books, with experts, the wise teachers, inside the brains of the best philosophers from history, tapes, and all other resources I possibly could get my hands on.

My own logic told me none of us should live in the past if the memories which haunt us are negative and drain our energies. This is obviously unhealthy, so why would anybody want to do that? I mean, I believe we are a smart species, and this is not a difficult choice to make. What would you like in your life: More happiness or more sorrow? Here is the more irritating aspect: If the past memories are good, for many, somehow that measures to their present being not good enough which translates to their best times being behind them. Our breed, thus, loses hope and drive for the future leaving us to the mercy of only a few mentally strong and wise who move our world forward while the rest of us blindly, many times, sleepingly follow.

I know you don’t want to think like that. I know you don’t want to live in the past, then why is that not only you, but most people out there do? Why? One of my latest obsessions, I started researching, and after all the working, mental struggles and frustrations looking for the solution, I got the answer to this million dollar question.

The Answer

Firstly, our brains even in the world of abundant choices in food, clothes, places to live at, people to marry and date; abundance of work we can do, and abundance of technology and access to many other resources, are still evolving at a much slower pace on the inside than at which the world is revolutionizing on the outside.

Our brain still holds wiring from our nomadic ancestral times where survival was the name of the game. Remember, in those days, humans got up to survive, not thrive. They got up to hunt, not nurture. It was the wild age of scarcity belief, and every day was a fight in the jungle. Please remember, this went on for ages and ages and ages. In fact, so long that it formed sort of a permanent pattern in our brains, the hardwired brain wave which still exists.

Though as I mentioned above, we now live in the age of abundance (regardless you believe it or not, we do; look around and you will know exactly what I am talking about!), this old unwanted wiring still gauges feelings of fear and survival in us keeping us small. It stops us from advancing, taking risks, and the worst, it makes us hold on to our older patterns even if they don’t serve the purpose anymore. It is for this very reason that despite conscious awareness of their issues, for most people, it is very difficult to change in reality. Past memories, good and bad keep us comfortable. They keep us small and somehow a part of our brain likes that comfort because it is the comfort of the known; something which was crucial for our ancestors to survive on.

It’s a Negative World, Initially, Not Eventually

Yes, it’s true that we live in a negative world. But understand, it’s not that the world is negative; the world is as we make of it. It’s us, the people who are responsible for our sorry state of affairs across the globe. But also know a different reality is possible, and in many instances existent. As a matter of fact, realize that we live in a world of constant growth and evolution, a world of replacing the new with the old (with exceptions of powerful timeless principles.) Eventually, we will be a world full of optimism only if we help our own cause and fight the…

The Human Need for Drama

Finally, grasp that we, humans, love drama. We are an attention seeking breed who wants to feel important and our opinions counted for. This is a part of us, and for most people out there, I would not suggest you try fighting it. Instead, use this trait to your advantage. Drama can be created around anything, so why not create good drama? Why not grab attention because of your optimistic outlook towards the present and the future?

Combine the comprehension of our brain wiring, negativity in the world around us, and the human need to feel important, and you will know exactly why our pasts play such an important role in how we conduct ourselves in the present, and what we think of our futures.

My request to you is that knowing what you know now, change your thought process. Rome wasn’t built in a day, nor will you become a super human in a day. You won’t wake up tomorrow morning, and find the world to be just as desired. You will still have a lot of negativity and challenges to conquer out there. But, make a choice to not live in your past. In addition, adapt the attitude of recreating yourself and improving at all times. Do this, and you will be well on your way to becoming that wise soul who will, then, slowly, but surely be driving our race to better horizons.

Key Note: One of the most helpful techniques I know of to live a great day everyday is by starting your day right. Watch a small video on how to start your day right by right here

 

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